Would you trust a partner who infects you with an STI?

We will call him Trustless Man so as to hide his real identity. Trustless Man recently made an intriguing discovery in his relationship life. He got infected with herpes and can you guess from whom he got the STI? Well, his partner of two years. Trustless Man moved into her house some four months ago. As he was making some arrangements within that house, he encountered a doctor’s report that indicated she had herpes. He right away confronted her with the issue and she opened up, telling him that she got the infection 10 years ago from her ex-husband.

What makes him angry is that she never told him or disclose STD status at the start of their relationship. Neither did he bother to ask.

Suffers from Leukemia – herpes can be deadly

Trustless Man suffers from leukemia. That means that being infected with herpes basically puts his life in a lot of danger. At the time of his diagnosis, his partner was informed that other infections could kill him but she still hid the information.

Her excuse for this is that she was not able to put “two and two” together.

Trustless Man has thus lost his trust in her for having hidden such valuable information. He worries whether this trust can ever be rebuilt.

Helping Trustless Man

The immediate realization we get from his situation is that he his partner had no plans whatsoever to disclose STD status or just inform him about the herpes condition until he became sick.

She uses a “two and two” analogy that is not so easily believable. If you have any common STDs, it is your responsibility to let your sex partner aware of that. It does not matter whether your partner is highly vulnerable or not.

For Trustless Man to go on with this relationship, she has to really give an explanation that is plausible. The excuse that “I forgot” does not hold much. “I felt shame and thought you wouldn’t love me if you knew” to some extent may be plausible.

Having listened to her excuse, he will then have to devise a method of forgiving her. This can be seen as a test for their relationship. How strong is it and how well do they understand each other? If he is unable to forgive her for this, he will never be able to forgive him.

In responding to his question as to whether she can be trusted, no she cannot. It’s so unfortunate he found himself in this situation.

In any case if their trust has to get back on track, it is paramount for her to admit her wrongs and ask for forgiveness. She has to also provide answers to all questions that may arise. As a step to ensure you are safe health-wise, she must accompany Trustless Man to a doctor so that they can get medical counseling. A relationship counselor will prove helpful here.

 

Contributor: admin